职场幽默英语故事集绵
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职场幽默英语故事(一)
A newly married woman was sitting on a chair, looking vexed, when her husband came home. "What's up? Why do you look so troubled?" the husband asked. The woman replied, "I'm so sorry. I was ironing your new suit and
burned a hole in your trousers." And the man said, "That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same."
"Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair," the wife responded.
有一个刚结婚的太太,坐在椅子那边,看起来很懊恼,她先生回家看到她这个样子,就 问:‘嗨,你怎么啦?为什么看起来这么懊恼呢?’太太说:‘很抱歉,你那件新做的'西装裤 被我烫坏了,烫成一个洞了。 他先生说:’‘啊! 那个没关系啦! 我还有另外一件一样的裤子。 ’ 她说: ‘是啊,还好我把那件新的拿出来补那件被我烫坏的。 ’
职场幽默英语故事(二)
A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years? "God replied, "I didn't recognize you."
一名中年妇女心脏病突发被送到了医院, 在手术台上,濒临死亡之际,她看到了上帝, 于 是,她问上帝是不是她的日子到头了。 上帝回答说, “还没有,你还能活43年,2个月零8 天。 身体快要康复的时候,这名女士想到自己还要活那么多年,得好好对待自己,于是决 ” 定先不出院,而是去给自己整整容,吸吸脂,隆隆胸,然后还做了一个腹部拉皮和其它一些 美容美体手术。她甚至还请人到医院里面帮她头发给染了。 做完最后一个手术,这位女 士出院了, 但就在过马路的时候,她被一辆风驰电挚赶回医院的救护车给撞死了。再一 次,她又站到了上帝的面前,她大惑不解地问上帝, “我记得你说我还能再活 40 年?” 上帝回答,“那个时候我没认出你来” 。
职场幽默英语故事(三)
The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film. When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them, “you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refund you the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husband asked his wife, “What do you think of the film?” “I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered. “It’s not worth seeing.” “I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said. “Wake the child up and let him cry.”
一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影。进电影院时,服务员对他们说:“如果你们的儿子 哭了,你们就得出去。不过我们会给你们退票的。”大约半个小时以后,丈夫对妻子说: “你 觉得这电影怎么样?”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影。”妻子回答说,“真不值得看。“我也 ”不喜欢看。”丈夫说: “叫醒孩子,让他哭。 ”